Don't bother to read..

these tears just won't stop flowing.
at moments like this, i feel that, LIFE would be so much better without me.


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i feel so lost, so scared. When i finally thought there's somewhere i could be safe, things just happens. It always does..

What have i done in my previous life to make the present so miserable?

Maybe it's the way i talk, maybe it's just me. LOOK AT ME!. people hate me.

Do you dare to say you never once spoke bad about me? Maybe you don't now, but you use to?

my own sister Carol has spoken words that broke my heart.

Even my OWN present boyfriend has spoken unlikely words about me.

my closest friends ( i don't want to mention you name here ) has even talked about me.

more from i don't even know.

me? famous for being a faat slut or a bitch. or some words u use to say and describe me.


back home, i thought life was bad. Maybe i was just another spoilt kid. Maybe i was just someone who didn't know how to appreciate things.



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If you hadn't meet me. Things wouldn't have happened between you and her. Nobody would be there to saw what happened. Or tell you what happen.

Or maybe i should have kept quiet all along, because now it seems that it's my fault that you were angry. it looks like i have been putting oil on fire all the time.

Have you ever felt as if a knife just went through you heart?

Or you got shot by a gun in the head where your brains just explode?

Or someone stuffing cotton into your mouth and you can't breath?

Or pushing you underwater that you're about to drown?

Cz.. that's how i feel right now.




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I'm so emotionless right now. It's as if happiness were sucked away from me. I'm felt nothing but a body.

If there is a room, i could hide myself. i would be there. and the world outside would be so much happier without me.

and your life would be how you jsut wanted.

Noone to bother you, or to worry about.

No one to grumble about or get angry about.

And mostly, no one to annoy you or making you mad.

i am nothing but yet a fool.

Foolishly enough to think there's is such pure happiness in this world.











i wanna say i'm sorry and just ease with whatever you all say. Blame me and i don't care. it's not as if it's the first time.

i wanna say i'm sorry but i was right. i didn't say anything wrong, and maybe it's just a miscommunication. But i don't want to hear you yelling at me and then keep pointing out my faults.





i live in a strange world. where there's no where call home. i move and sleep about wherever there's space. i try to make myself as invisible as i could.

and i'm sorry to bother everyone.