i feel like shit now. and in additional, i'm having fever and this stupid viral infection. i'm tired and wish i could just shut myself down and restart it refreshly..

Sayang hasn't been talking to me the whole day...T___T..i know i'm being over-sensitive. but i dunno anything anymore when he's not around. is he mad? why wouldn't he reply me? i'm sorry..T__T..

i feel so bad bad deep inside. I usually tell him everything and now it's like..i feel bad not telling him it..

Sayang's birthday is coming up and i reli don't know what to give. i'm so disappointed at myself. Kinda think of it. a crush on him for one year has made a very big difference. Everytime he looks at me, my face blushes up. Everytime he comes near me, i wish i could hug him tight. everytime his face is next to mine, my heat beats as if it were about to jump out.

I sit next to him, my heart beats face, m mind wanders off and i'm glad he's right next to me, i'm stund and crazed by the moment. and never thought this would happen to me.
Even though we see each other everyday, i still sit and think of you. not a single second missed out. When we are apart, i lose faith in us, and i tend to think, is he thinking of me? or did he just forgot bout me..
i'm sick with fever and i feel dizzy. how i wish he could be next to me. I don't care whether he's watching tv or he's asleep. as long as he's next to me. As long as i can see him from far.
I'm not being a stalker.and maybe i am to some, but this happens, when you admire someone.

I lose faith in myself and i don't trust myself, because there are so many others, out there for him to chose. I sit and think, where have i lost? and i realize, i lost from every aspect..

i love you. and hope you do too.
i'll wait, no matter how long it takes.
two and a half months has pass, and i'll still wait. No matter how much it hurts, i'll still be next to you..

i may sound crazy but it's true, all i want to is have you.